17 April 2013

Cycle Day 21: Happy Birthday to Me

Yesterday's progesterone was 35.3. I did a booster of Novarel and am now waiting until Friday, April 26th to test since it takes 10 days for the HCG to leave my system.

Today I turn 34, which makes me officially one year away from ADVANCED MATERNAL AGE. So here's hoping this gets sorted out. I'm decidedly unhappy with the way things have gone with my nurses this time. Again, really really hoping this is it for me.

I had a dresser delivered today. Specifically picked today, because talk about a birthday present. Upon inspection, the drawers are all wonky. This makes me feel many different ways . . . irritated, meh, angry, meh, sad, meh, and super irritated. I think I'm so PTSDy from all these losses (especially the last one) that I don't really have many emotions. Who needs drugs to feel like an absolute zombie when you have recurrent pregnancy loss?

12 April 2013

Cycle Day 16: Life Goes On

My grandmother has been dead a week now. I was inseminated on Tuesday morning--the day of her funeral (and what would have been her 80th birthday). It would be great if this worked, but if it couldn't work for our wedding anniversary, why would it work for my grandmother's birthday? I want to write something about my grandmother's influence and all that. Must make it happen.

04 April 2013

Cycle Day 8: Grow Grow Grow

My estradiol level was 480, my lining was 13 (they want it over 6), and I have some growing follies. The largest one was 14, but I think there was a 13 or two, maybe an 11, and a 9. So the plan is to continue 150 of gonal-f for tonight and tomorrow night and then go for another scan Saturday morning at 8:00 am. The doctor today thought I might be triggering on Saturday. Or it could be Sunday. Also Saturday morning, we're getting our eye exams. So it's shaping up to be another busy weekend.

01 April 2013

Cycle Day 5: Money Money Money

I started giving my gonal-f injections Saturday night. I had forgotten about the smell. It's very band-aidy. Today at lunch I picked up a couple more boxes of the gonal-f and a box of novarel. $424.50. Sweet Jesus.

Also on Saturday we went the funeral of the mother of one of my sister's friends. I had never met her, but this particular friend is essentially an extra sister. She's been on family vacation with us. Sitting at the funeral we heard about what an amazing woman her mom was. She will definitely leave a void in the community and in the lives of her three children. It was a good service and more than once I found tears running down my face. I had waffled about going, but I'm glad we were there. Funerals are for the living, and I hoped the family was able to see how much they are loved.